Thursday, October 30, 2008

RATEL.

Ek sit alleen bo op my Ratel. Ek is alleen vandag, my mede soldate is almal weg vir n dag se rus en om te ontvlug van die konstante opleiding. Ek was nie lus om saam te gaan nie, ek wou net alleen wees. Net een dag van rus en vrede saam met myself. Ek vat n diep teug van my siggaret en knyp die kooltjie dood en sit die stompie in my sak ,en tuur oor die stil winterveld uit. N ligte bries waai en die gras ritsel saam. Alles in die Gods verlate plek is grys en dood. Winter hier is nie speletjies nie, dink ek. Maar vandag is perfek, dis koud maar nie vriesend nie. My aapjas hou my lekker warm.

“Chappie!” ruk n stem my tot realiteit. Dit was Majoor Brand, of Majoor Chappies soos ons hom noem. “Klim af en kom hier se hy in n diep stem!” Terwyl ek afklim tref dit my, geen soldaat mag bo op n Ratel sit of staan nie, great ek gaan n opvok kry op my dag af.
Ek draf na die Majoor toe en halt voor hom en salueer. “More Majoor !” se ek en wag vir die donderstorm om los te bars. “Wat rook jy Chappie ?” “Menthol Majoor, craven a menthols,” antwoord ek.” Nou laat ons rook se die spook,” se die Majoor en hy glimlag vir my. My hand bewe toe ek die siggaret en aansteker na hom uithou.

Majoor Chappies is nie iemand met wie jy speel nie, hy is al diep in die veertigs met diep donker bruin oe wat al te veel van die lewe gesien het. Die rede hoekom ons hom Majoor Chappies noem is omdat hy altyd na die troepe en range laer as syne verwys as Chappie, ek het hom nog nooit hoor verwys na n troep as n roof of rower of slangkak of enige van die kleurvolle name wat die korporale mee kon opkom nie. Ons was net Chappie of Chaps en dit was dit. “Majoor ek, ek… is jammer ek het bo die ratel gesit… ek het…” “Relax Chappie ek kon sien jy was ver weg en elk geval ons is ver weg van vyandelike gebied, it stays between us.” Se hy en knipoog vir my. Ek staan egter agterdogtig nog op aandag en weet nie wat om te se nie. Die man was tog op n stadium n bevelvoerder in Angola, hy was in die hitte van Ops Protea en ander operasies waarvan n nat agter die ore Ratel drywer net kan droom. “Kom Chappie stap saam my.”

Met dit draai hy om en begin stadig na my Ratel toe stap. “Ek het jou al dop gehou Chappie, Beukes is mos jou van, is ek reg?” Vir n oomblik is ek sprakeloos, ek is een van agthonderd Ratel drywers in die eenheid en hy ken wragtig my van, “ja Majoor” se ek. “Ek ken al jul name my Chappie,” en hy gee weer n glimlag. “Ek is mos verantwoordelik vir julle opleiding ek is mos die baas van die plaas as dit kom by die, en hy klap sy hand teen my Ratel se wand, moordmasjiene!”

“Moenie so verbaas wees nie Chappie, dis presies wat die Ratels is, ja julle jong laaities sien die goed as cool en awesome, maar as jy dit kon sien soos ek dit al gesien het sal jy anders voel.” Ek skuifel ongemaklik rond en steek toe maar nog n siggaret aan. “Ek het jou al dop gehou Beukes jy is altyd eenkant meng nie somer met die ander nie, jou Ratel is altyd skoon en met staalperades is jy en jou Chappies altyd die enigste wat nie n opvok kry nie, glo my ek het al gesoek vir foute met inspeksies maar ek kan sien jy kyk na jou Ratel. En dis wat die ander nie besef nie, dis daai dissepline wat lewens red.”

Weet jy wat ons Ratels in Angola genoem het?” “Nee Majoor.”se ek nou meer op my gemak.
“Bliksnyers Chappie, bliksnyers…” “Hoekom Majoor?” Die Majoor neem n diep sug en gaan sit stadig met sy rug teen die Ratel se agterwiel, “gee my nog n smoke dan vertel ek jou kom, kom sit hier langs my.” Ek gaan sit langs die Majoor en gee hom my pakkie en aansteker nadat hy n siggaret aan gesteek het sit hy die pakkie tussen ons op die grond neer maar hy speel stadig met my aansteker en tuur voor hom uit, ek kan sien die man se gedagtes begin ver terug gaan in tyd.

“Ons was in n geveg betrokke met n groep terroriste hulle het van ons manne vas geskiet met russiese tenks, toe roep ons die Ratels in, hulle was die naaste aan die konflik, ek het daai dag gesien hoe jong seuns soos jy n russiese panser tenk uitskiet met net n 20mm kanon en n brownie in die toring.” “ Dit was asof die duiwel himself in ons troepe was daai dag, hulle het een van ons Ratels uit gehaal met n 90mm kanon op een van hul T56 tenks.” “ Die troepe was swaar gewond en verbrand, vier was dood, die rondte het die voertuig in die middel getref, toe die drywer sien almal is uit insluitend die dooies het hy eenvoudig sy voet neer gesien en teen topspoed op daai russiese tenk af gejaag.” “Nou die skerp punt neus van die Ratel het daai tenk teen seker maklik 70km/ph getref en het daai tenk soos n blik sardines oop geruk van voor tot reg in die middel, daar was een moerse ontploffing en die Ratel en die tenk was in vlamme gehul.” “ Wat daai klomp terroriste gedink het weet ek nie maar hulle het net daar stert tussen die bene gevlug, vandaar die naam bliksnyer, my Chappie.”

“Bliksem Majoor!” is al wat ek kon se. “Ja Chappie as jy enige tenk reg tref met n Ratel se neus sny jy hom oop soos n blik sardines, weet jy hoekom noem ek julle manne Chappies?” vra hy onverwags.
“Nee Majoor, ek weet nie.” “Hmmm nou kom ek vertel jou, dit was op daai selfde dag na die konflik, ons was op pad terug na die basis in konfooi, ek was saam met n drywer skutter Chapman heel agter in die konfooi, my Ratel was ook buite aksie, ons het in n ou Bedford met voorraad in gery toe begin die trok te ruk en pluk en proes en gaan staan net daar met ons langs die pad.” “Die konfooi wag nie vir n man nie so toe spring ons uit en ek en Chappies dit was Chapman se bynaam begin toe soek na die fout. Maar die heel donerse tyd is die troepie in my pad as ek oor die enjin leun dan le die seun omtrent bo op my as ek onder die trok is dan is hy weer daar omtrent bo op my.”

“Ek het my later so vervies dat ek los gebars het op die mannetjie, vokkof onder my voete uit troep het ek gegil hoe de donner moet ek die trok reg maak met jou die heel tyd in my pad. En daar slat daai man my asem weg, en hoe ek na julle manne kyk vir die res van my lewe.”

“Luitenat , dit was my rang toe, het hy kalm gese, ek het gehoor hoe praat die manne vandag van jou, ek het gehoor hoe jy hulle gelei het in die geveg. Ek het gehoor hoe se hulle as dit nie vir jou was nie sou hulle al ons manne uit gewis het, ek het gehoor hoe jy openlik voor die ander begin huil het oor Anderson wat sy lewe op gegee het en in daai russe se tenk vas gejaag het. Jy gee om vir jou manne luitenant, die weermag het mense soos jy nodig. Ek Luitenant is net n drywer ek het in n weeshuis groot geword, ek het niemand in my lewe nie, en ek was nie in die pad nie Luitenant, ek wou jou maar net beskerm. Ek het gedink as die vyand skielik hier aankom dan kan hulle my eerste raak skiet, en dit kan Luitenat n kans gee om weg te kom.”

Ek was sprakeloos en kon aan niks dink om te se vir Majoor Brand nie. Hy het stadig op gestaan en af gekyk na my,” dit is hoekom ek julle Chappies noem, julle is die wiel wat die oorlogs masjien laat draai ons range is net n bietjie olie om dinge glad te hou, maar ek het na daai dag nooit weer sleg van of met n troep gepraat nie julle boys is my Chappies.”

Ek het op gestaan en my hand na die Majoor uit gehou hy het my n ferm handskud gegee.” Vandag bly tussen my en jou Beukes?” “Dis reg so Majoor,” en ek het op aandag gekom en hom met trots gesalueer. Hy het my terug gesalueer om gedraai en stadig weg gestap. Ek was alleen tussen al die Ratels en moordmasjiene. In die stilte het ek die gekraak en steun van die metal gehoor. En skielik het ek gewens ek was eerder saam my ander Chappies op dorps pas.

TEARJERKER. FOR THE DESERT ROSE.


Well I wish there was someone
Well I wish there was someone
To love me

When I used to be someone
And I knew there was someone
That loved me

As I sit here frozen alone
Even ghosts get tired and go home
As they crawl back under the stones

And I wish there was something
Please tell me there's something better
And I wish there was something more than this
Saturated loneliness

And I wish I could feel it
And I wish I could steal it
Abduct it, corrupt it, but I never can
it's just saturated loneliness

Does the silence get lonely?
Does the silence get lonely?
Who knows?
I've been hearing it tell me
I've been hearing it tell me
Go home

Cause the freaks are playing tonight
They packed up and turned out the lights

And I wish there was something
Please tell me there's something better
And I wish there was something more than this
Saturated loneliness

And I wish I could feel it
And I wish I could steal it
Abduct it, corrupt it, but I never can
It's just saturated loneliness

And the bath waters cold
And this life's getting old

And I wish I could feel it
And I wish I could feel it
And I wish I could steal it
Abduct it, corrupt it
And I wish I could feel it
And I wish I could steal it
And I wish I could feel it
Abduct it, corrupt it
But I never can
I never can
Never Can
Never Can
Never Can


ARTIST: KORN.

SEE YOU ON THE OTHER SIDE.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

BELOVED

it's colder than before
the seasons took all they had come for
now winter dances here
it seems so fitting don't you think?
to dress the ground in white
and grey

it's so quiet I can hear
my thoughts touching every second
that I spent waiting for you
circumstances afford me
no second chance to tell you
how much I've missed you

my beloved do you know
when the warm wind comes again
another year will start to pass
and please don't ask me why I'm here
something deeper brought me
than a need to remember

we were once young and blessed with wings
no heights could keeps us from their reach
no sacred place we did not soar
still greater things burned within us
I don't regret the choices that I've made
I know you feel the same

my beloved do you know
how many times I stared at clouds
thinking that I saw you there
these are feelings that do not pass so easily
I can't forget what we claimed was ours

moments lost though time remains
I am so proud of what we were
no pain remains, no feeling
eternity awaits
grant me wings that I might fly
my restless soul is longing
no pain remains, no feeling
eternity awaits

Artist: VNV Nation.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

SAB.



At a world brewing convention in the States, the CEOs of various brewing organizations retire to the bar at the end of the day.
Bruce, CEO of Fosters, shouts to the barman: 'In Australia, we make the best bloody beer in the world, so pour me a Fosters, mate.'
Bob, CEO of Budweiser, calls out next: 'In the States, we brew the king of them all - gimme a Bud.'
Hans steps up next: 'In Germany ve invented beer. Give me un Helles, ze REAL King of beers.'
Jan, chief executive of Grolsch, follows by stating that Grolsch is the ultimate beer and asks for one with two fingers of foam on top.
Norman, chairman of SAB, is next: 'Barman, give me a diet Coke with ice and lemon please.'
The other four stare at him in stunned silence, then Bruce asks: 'Aren't you going to have a Castle, Norm?'
Norman replies 'Well, if you guys aren't drinking beer, then neither am I.'

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

THE PEOPLE I MISS MOST TODAY

DAD: 27/01/1931-21/08/2006
MOM: 15/10/1935-22/02/2007

All that we needed, was right
The threshold is breaking, tonight

Open to everything happy and sad
Seeing the good when it's all going bad
Seeing the sun when I can't really see
Hoping the sun will at least look at me

Focus on everything better today
All that I needed I never could say
Hold on to people they're slipping away
Hold on to this while it's slipping away

All that we needed, tonight
Are people who love us, and life
I know how it feels to need
Oh when we leave here, you'll see

Open to everything happy and sad
Seeing the good when it's all going bad
Seeing the sun when I can't really see
Hoping the sun will at least look at me

Focus on everything better today
All that I needed I never could say
Hold on to people they're slipping away
Hold on to this while it's slipping away

So long
So long

Open to everything happy and sad
Seeing the good when it's all going bad
Seeing the sun when I can't really see
Hoping the sun will at least look at me

Focus on everything better today
All that I needed I never could say

Hold on to people they're slipping away


ARTIST: MOBY - HOTEL-SLIPPING AWAYI WILL ALWAYS REMEMBER YOU, LOVE YOUR SON.

Thursday, October 9, 2008

WALKING AWAY.


WALKING AWAY FROM ALL THIS PAIN I FEEL, THE CONSTANT AWARENESS THAT DRIVES ME MAD
WALKING AWAY FROM THIS HATE FILLED WORLD, THE AWARENESS THAT DRIVES ME INSANE
WALKING AWAY FROM THE PEOPLE OF THIS WORLD, THEY BREAK MY HEART EVERY DAY
WALKING AWAY FROM THE LUST AND GREED, A DISEASE THAT IS SPAWNED BY US
WALKING AWAY FROM THE VIOLENCE AND ANGER OF THIS GENERATION
WALKING AWAY FROM THE SEXUAL PEVERSIONS OF MANKIND
WALKING AWAY FROM THE LIES AND DECEIT OF US
WALKING AWAY FROM THE LACK OF TRUST
WALKING AWAY FROM THE NEW ORDER
WALKING AWAY FROM THE THEM
WALKING AWAY FROM YOU
WALKING AWAY FROM ME
WALKING AWAY
WALKING
GONE

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

THE FRAGILE (AN ODE TO THE DESERT ROSE).



She shines
In a world full of ugliness
She matters
When everything is meaningless
Fragile
She doesnt see her beauty
She tries
To get away
Sometimes
It's just that nothing seems worth saving
I can't watch her slip away

I won't let you fall apart
I won't let you fall apart
I won't let you fall apart
I won't let you fall apart

She reads the minds of all the people as they pass her by
Hoping someone will see
If I could fix myself I'd...
But it's too late for me

I won't let you fall apart
I won't let you fall apart
I won't let you fall apart
I won't let you fall apart

We'll find the perfect place to go where we can run and hide
We'll build a wall and we can keep them on the other side
But they keep waiting and picking
And picking

It's something I have to do (I won't let you fall apart)
I was there, too (I won't let you fall apart)
Before everything else (I won't let you fall apart)
I was like you (I won't let you fall apart)


ARTIST: NINE INCH NAILS.

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

DANTE'S PRAYER.



When the dark wood fell before me
And all the paths were overgrown
When the priests of pride say there is no other way
I tilled the sorrows of stone

I did not believe because I could not see
Though you came to me in the night
When the dawn seemed forever lost
You showed me your love in the light of the stars

Cast your eyes on the ocean
Cast your soul to the sea
When the dark night seems endless
Please remember me

Then the mountain rose before me
By the deep well of desire
From the fountain of forgiveness
Beyond the ice and fire

Cast your eyes on the ocean
Cast your soul to the sea
When the dark night seems endless
Please remember me

Though we share this humble path, alone
How fragile is the heart
Oh give these clay feet wings to fly
To touch the face of the stars

Breathe life into this feeble heart
Lift this mortal veil of fear
Take these crumbled hopes, etched with tears
We'll rise above these earthly cares

Cast your eyes on the ocean
Cast your soul to the sea
When the dark night seems endless
Please remember me
Please remember me


ARTIST: Loreena McKennitt

Monday, October 6, 2008

FOR MY GYPSY WITH THE RESTLESS SOUL.


It must be summer the sky is clear
The garden is so beautiful
All the flowers and all the trees
Make Me feel like they're inside of Me
I'm holding My friend’s hand
While we're walking in this land
It's all but a dream

My bed is moving, I cannot see a thing
I am in total darkness, someone is calling
I can feel the cold, it's all around Me
I know it's not a dream, No no no

Someone is in My room
Standing at the end of My bed
Must be a visit from a restless soul

Now I see her figure, her face against the glass
And there's no reflection, she's in the mirror
Could it really be, has she returned?
My dearest gypsy

My dearest gypsy will you tell me
You know we don't have no secrets
Must be a visit from a restless soul
"I will send You a dream...”


Adapted from a visit from the dead by King Diamond.

Wednesday, October 1, 2008